Every Mule down in Mule-ville, liked Muhlenberg a lot.
But the rest of the Centennial Conference. Did NOT!

The opposition hated the ’Berg! Every week of the season.
Now please don’t ask why. No one quite knows the reason.

It could be our softball team got too many hits.
It could be that soccer just wouldn’t seem to quit.
But I think the most likely reason of all,
May have been playing the Mules was like hitting a brick wall.

But, whatever the reason, football or field hockey
They’d show up to play, a little less cocky.

For they knew every Mule in Mule-ville was tough
Cross Country, tennis and volleyball as if that wasn’t enough
Lacrosse, golf and basketball they say it with fear
2003 was exhausting, 2004 is almost here!

The opponents sit around, fingers nervously drumming
We must find some way to stop 2004 from coming.

For next year, they knew
Mule baseball and track
Will have success early, leading the pack.

And then! Oh, the cheers! Oh, the Cheers! Cheers! Cheers! Cheers!
That’s one thing they hated. The Cheers! Cheers! Cheers! Cheers!

Then the Mules, young and old would rise from their seats
Clapping their hands, and stomping their feet.

They would cheer, Let’s Go Mules! And ’Berg is the Best!
The cheerleaders made sure that the crowd did not rest.

And then they’d do something rivals liked least of all!
Every Mule down in Mule-ville, the tall and the small
Would all come together, when opponents were idle
Chalk it up in the books, another Centennial Conference title!

They’d win! And they’d win! And they’d Win! Win! Win! Win!
And the more the rivals thought of this Muhlenberg win,
The more rivals thought, “We must stop this whole thing!”

“For several years we’ve put up with it now!”
“We MUST stop 2004 from coming!”
“But HOW?”

Then they got an idea! An awful idea! The opponents got a wonderfully awful idea!

“We know just what to do!” The opponents laughed to themselves.
“We’ll just go to Allentown and be little elves.”
“Instead of bringing them luck, and things to make them better, we’ll take all of their equipment.”
“The sooner the better!”

With all the equipment gone to try to change the rules
They realized it would take more than that to shut down the Mules.

And the opponents, with their feet not knowing where to go
Stood puzzling and puzzling: “How could it be so?”

They won without javelins!
They won without bats!
They won without shoulder pads, racquets, hurdles, or hats!

And they puzzled for hours, till their puzzlers were sore.
Then the rivals thought of something they hadn’t before!
“Maybe winning,” they thought, “takes a little bit more.”

And what happened then...? Well ... in Mule-ville they say
That the Centennial Conference became stronger that day!

For they realized they musn’t continue to feel spite
For they realized perhaps they must play to a new height.
And they brought back the equipment and all of the tools
Then they
They themselves
Congratulated the Mules!

Note: Lindsay Weiss is an assistant athletic trainer at Muhlenberg. Happy New Year to all Mule sports fans! Mule Sports Daily will be back on Monday, Jan. 5, 2004.